You may have read some of my writing about dogs.
I’ve written a lot over years about the many things our dogs have taught me about my walk with God as we build our relationship, walk the neighborhood together daily, and experience the minutiae of daily life.
For example, they’ve taught me how to lead, how to follow, how to walk in peace and unity, how to age gracefully, and how to invite the blessings of friendship and unconditional love, sometimes in sudden and surprising ways.
Back in August, we had to say goodbye to our big brown angelic dog Jeff tragically and prematurely. He had lost the use of his back legs, and the vet had no viable options for fixing him. Our hearts were absolutely crushed to give up on him. It still hurts a lot.
To soften the blow, my husband began researching dogs online. It felt a little hasty to me, as we were still reeling with grief, but I didn’t discourage him. He seemed to find consolation in it.
Rick’s search led to a woman who had purchased a miniature Golden Doodle and couldn’t keep him. We jumped on it because we knew this to be a wonderful breed—super cute and smart, non-shedding, and non-allergenic.
So, welcome home Tucker!
I’ve heard it said, and experienced it to some degree myself, that we get amnesia about the pain of childbirth and the endless work of caring for babies and toddlers. God helps us forget so that we’ll keep having babies. God really loves when his people have babies.
The same can be said about puppies. It’s been a good while since we’ve had to train a puppy. Wow. As cute as he is, he can be a major pain.
He requires constant supervision or he finds trouble.
Recently on a Facetime call with my son and his family, I enjoyed watching my granddaughter Sage flit from toy to toy, person to person, activity to activity. I call it Short Attention Span Theatre.
I commented to my daughter-in-law that Sage and Tucker could be siblings. They even look alike, with moppy red curls, the most endearing expressions, and funny ways of moving.
The behavior of puppies and toddlers is so similar!
They both have a purely self-centered focus. Sage shouts “No!” or “Mine” at the most inconvenient times for her parents. She makes messes from room to room with no intention of cleaning up after herself. She demands attention as if she is the queen of the world.
Tucker grabs a shoe or slipper (or anything that’s left unguarded) and runs out to the yard with it. He wants me to chase him to get it back; we both know that I won’t catch him unless he wants to be caught. So I refuse to chase him and reinforce this annoying habit. He digs holes. He shreds shoelaces, rugs, and stuffed animals mercilessly.
The two of them remind me of Proverbs 22:15:
Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child, but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.
Or, as the Message paraphrases the same verse:
Young people are prone to foolishness and fads; the cure comes through tough-minded discipline.
I provide both because the King James version may be off-putting to those who strongly oppose any form of physical punishment. Of course, I would never never sanction physical violence against any child or puppy, and the Bible doesn’t either. But back when this was written, and still today, administering a minor, non-injurious moment of pain can effectively change behavior.
Most of us prefer other means of discipline, reserving physical discipline for the most egregious errors. Behavioral psychologist will tell you that positive reinforcement is the most effective approach in the long run.
There may be appropriate times for a swat on the rear for Sage, or a swat on the nose for Tucker. But if we want to reinforce a desired behavior, for Sage, we are wise to give the reward of a cookie, cuddle time with Dad, an interesting new toy, or a fun trip out when she is behaving well. For Tucker, much the same. This is much more pleasant than punishment any day.
That’s all pretty simple with puppies and toddlers, but what about us? I wonder how God views my trainability as a disciple. How am I doing, Lord? Am I receiving and responding to your discipline?
- Do I wander into territory and take on things that don’t belong to me, and then gnaw on them mentally like Tucker with his bone?
- Do I distractedly move from activity to activity to avoid silence, meditation, and introspection, and wind up feeling empty and uninspired?
- Do I ignore the Holy Spirit’s warning about my attitudes and choices and find myself stuck in emotional or physical pain?
- Do I demand to have my way and judge others when they disappoint me? Remnants of foolishness can remain in the hearts of grownups and long-time disciples. The Bible calls it sin, whether covetousness, anger, unforgiveness, gossip, drunkenness, or lack of self-control.
Like puppies and toddlers, we can act as though we are entitled to make demands of God and others that are neither reasonable nor permissible.
What is the cure? It is still the rod of discipline, but what does that look like for a disciple of Jesus Christ? Several means of discipline come to mind.
- It is in the quiet, convicting whisper of the Holy Spirit within, keeping me uncomfortable in my own skin until I’ve surrendered myself afresh to him.
- It is in a reality-based consequence of my carelessness and prayerlessness—a strained relationship, an illness or injury, or a failure to accomplish what I know I should.
- It is in noticing a lack of rhythm and flow of God’s grace, knowing that I experience this rhythm and flow consistently when I am in intimate fellowship with him.
Are we willing to admit our remnants of foolishness so God can correct us? Do we listen and change when we receive his discipline? Do we prioritize fellowship with him as the means to right fellowship with others? His discipline may seem hard, but it is always for our good (Heb. 12:11).
I want to be able to take Tucker anywhere, eventually, and trust that he will not be a nuisance or destroy anything, and he will come when I call him. I want to be able to spend time with Sage and know that she will pay attention and trust me to guide her.
I want God to be able to take me anywhere, now, and trust that I will make him proud of how much I take after his Son. Lord, I welcome your loving discipline.
